Richard Drozd While this is not my first Fanfic, this is the first one of mine getting posted. So now that you've had sufficient warning... The Argos and The Temple at Infinity's End Present: _-=^=-_ Misuteru Forsaken _-=^=-_ I really don't know what to say right now. Writing has never been something I've done well (as these chicken-scratches might tell you.) and now I am trying to put everything in my head down on paper. I know that it would have been more polite to say this directly to you, but it is all I can do to keep myself together while writing this. I think you, at least, understand how bad the last few weeks have been for me. Or maybe you don't. At the very least, you have not been making my life any worse, something I can't say about almost anyone else. Life has never been easy for me. Growing up with pop... sorry, 'Uncle Saotome'... constantly moving around, the weird training, like the Cat Fist, Jusenkyo, all the engagements, all the enemies... And now this. Everyone tells me I screamed for three hours straight after *it* happened, before I finally collapsed. I don't remember. I wouldn't be too surprised if I did. Sound strange for me to admit that? Let me tell you a secret. After Jusenkyo, nearly every nightmare I had was about being trapped in my cursed form. Po... Uncle Saotome really let into me a few times for waking up screaming during the weeks it took us to get back to Japan. However, none of my nightmares included the uncursed me still being around. And after *it* happened, everything moved so fast. Mom... Auntie Saotome being called to meet HIM. The week of watching the reunion, unable to participate. I remember being directly told by you to 'not rock the boat.' The first time I ever heard you use such direct language. Also the only time I ever felt betrayed by you. It was almost a relief when they moved away, back to Auntie's home. I thought, at least they were gone... even if it broke my heart to know that I would never be able to call Auntie 'Mom,' I thought, with them gone, I would at least have a chance to work out my own problems. Right? I should have known better. They come by practically everyday. And the way HE seems so content... so at peace... I don't think he realizes it, but he's taunting me, shoving in my face that which I can never have. Of course, this is me we're talking about. That was only the tip of the iceberg. Almost everyone I know treats me completely differently now. And none of that in a good way. Maybe you knew some of this. But the way you always seemed to edit out the unpleasantness around you, maybe you didn't. To put it in a nutshell, I no longer have any friends. Ukyo? My oldest friend? What about her? She's somewhat frightened of me. She has basically decided that I'm just 'Ranma's Curse' come to life. When she isn't bracing herself for me to transform into some form of demon and attack everybody, she's completely indifferent. The most complicated thing she's said to me since *it* happened is 'What would you like on your okonomiyaki?' As if she didn't know. From her, a subtle hint to get lost. Ryoga? At first I thought the old bandanna boy was sympathetic. Maybe he truly was. Too bad it didn't last past his next fight with Ranma. He can't defeat Ranma, so he takes out his anger by torturing me. At least Ranma isn't doing it intentionally, but Ryoga knows just how to get under my skin. Some friend. Everybody at school? I had something of a circle of friends there. 'Had' being the important word there. Did you know I have to go out to the forested area to eat lunch? If I don't, the guys bug me to no end, and the girls arrange 'accidents' for me. All the girls see me as some sort of perverted guy. All the guys care about is that now I'm a girl. The teachers are uncomfortable by my presence, and take the smallest excuse to send me away. I've had a few days were, instead of classes, I would spend the entire day standing out in the hall with buckets of water. The China gang... I had really hoped that Shampoo and Mousse would still be friends. But now that I'm a girl full time, all Shampoo sees is the girl who defeated her in combat in front of her village. And by her laws, I must die. She attacks at least once a day. The only thing holding her back at all is the concern about what killing me would do to her in Ranma's eyes. And that's not holding her back much. When I was learning the art, I promised myself I would never hit a girl. I broke that promise nearly a week ago. If I hadn't started fighting back, I wouldn't be alive now. The scary part is, it's getting easier to just beat Shampoo up a bit. I didn't even think twice about it the last time. Mousse? Let me quote something he said the last time we met. "Shampoo says you must die, and I will do anything for Shampoo." Cologne, at least she is still visiting her village in china. I don't want to think of what lengths she will go to help her Great-granddaughter kill me. The Kunos? That's a laugh. Those two haven't really changed much towards me. But I didn't like Kuno groping me before, or Kodachi trying to poison me. Only now I can't get rid of that part of them by taking a hot bath. And, of course, Happosai is worse than ever. I can barely get him to leave me alone. He's groped me, latched onto my chest, felt me up, and touched me in other ways. I've even woken up a couple times with him fondling my breasts! And since you insist I 'wear the proper attire,' I also have to worry about him stealing my underwear too! You're probably wondering about your family by now. You're probably thinking that, surely we've helped you. You'd like to think that, wouldn't you? Your father, on the outside, calls me 'niece' and lets me stay here, but I can tell that he only sees me as another burden he's got to bear. To him, I'm still a free-loader, not a member of his family. Nabiki, at first I wanted to thank her for forging records and something of a false past for me. Then I found out she only did it because pop... Uncle Saotome paid her to do so before Auntie noticed that I didn't have any. Then I caught her taking more pictures of me, this time even going for full nudes. It makes me very uncomfortable. It's sort of funny, really. Now that I'm stuck like this, I actually have something resembling 'feminine modesty.' It doesn't change the fact that Nabiki barely sees me as a human being. It's more like I'm a walking cash cow for her to milk for all I'm worth. She only cares about what I can do for her, and how much money I make or cost her, not about ME. And I'm sure, if I ever started costing her more than I made for her, I'd be out on the streets in a flash. Akane? I couldn't sort out my feelings for her before. Now, she doesn't treat me poorly, like just about everybody else, but she also makes no effort to include me in anything. From someone who is as outgoing and friendly as she is, this is another of those 'get lost' hints. She's willing to go to extremes to make a total stranger feel welcome, but is unable to be a friend to me. Face it, Kasumi. You are one of about five people who still treats me as a human being, and one of only two who treat me as a human being of any worth. (The other being Dr. Tofu.) And even as I said, I vividly recall you telling me to just accept being 'Ranko Tendo.' That is why I'm doing this. By the time you read this letter, I'll be long gone. Wait... No, I'm not going to kill myself. I've still got things to try before I give up any hope. But even so, I can't live here anymore. I've cried myself to sleep the last two nights. Me! The person who isn't supposed to cry at anything! If I stay here, I'll just fall deeper into this pit of despair, and then I WILL end up killing myself. I want to thank you for everything you've done. For treating me as a person, for getting me new clothes and explaining how to wear some of it right, for helping me during my first... you know. (I'll admit, when I saw the blood, I was scared out of my mind.) And I'm sorry about the money. I need some things I don't have anymore, like a backpack, camping equipment, and other supplies. I promise you, when I can, I WILL pay your family back for the money I took. I'll try and contact you again, sometime when I can. I only wish that I wasn't leaving a place I called home, and the people I thought of as a family for so long as a house with some acquaintances in it. -R-a-n-m-a---S-a-o-t-o-m-e- -R-a-n-k-o---T-e-n-d-o- Nobody _-=^=-_ Why the hell did I write this? God, I wish I knew. This thing popped into my head after I read some 'Split' type stories, and I admit, it's something that fascinates me. Even though it's unfinished, I consider "Two Sides of The Coin" by Benares as one of my favorites, and a major inspiration for this piece. (I also wish that Yingyang/Piccolo/whatever he calls himself would get around to doing the promised finish to "Coins" that he says Benares will let him do.) As I said, the idea of Ranma/Ranma-chan split fascinates me. In addition to this little piece, I'm working on (and put on hold) four other pieces that involve the split. (Of course, as things look now, three of those will never be read by anyone outside my immediate family.) How does the newly made girl handle her situation? How does everybody else react to her? Frankly, I see many ways it could happen, and one of them is what I described above. Now I'll admit, Ukyo and Akane seem a bit OOC, but I also firmly believe that they *could* end up reacting like that. Personally, both of them would be a little afraid of 'Ranko,' and unsure about their feelings toward her. They would/could develop a "Ignore her and she'll go away" attitude towards her for a while. And if one or the other were to do the wrong thing, hostility (like Ukyo showed) would ensue. C&C will always be appreciated. Unadulterated praise will be sent on a quest to find my lost ego. Flames will be used to keep the water hot in case those on my writing staff with curses (which is all of them, myself included!) needs it. Please, everybody out there, put "Jason" in the subject of any response to this. My address (rjdrozd@swbell.net) services multiple people. And here is the Mysterious, Disembodied Voice, with the appropriate disclaimers. yO! rANMA 1/2 IS THE PROPERTY OF THE ONE AND ONLY rUMIKO tAKAHASHI! iF THE BOSS HAD ACTUALLY COME UP WITH THESE CHARACTERS, THEY WOULDN'T BE NEARLY AS GOOD. nO DISRESPECT IS MEANT BY THIS, AND, IN FACT, THIS IS A FORM OF PRAISE. bETCHA DIDN'T KNOW THAT, HUH? -MDV Thank you from the Argos, and The Temple at Infinity's End. Jason; Writer and victim of the Longniichuan, J-ryu Ai; Genie, Moral Support, and Whip-cracker. Sean; Editor, World Warrior, and Part-time female. Kitsune; Fight coordinator, Pre-reader, Token Amazon, and Fox. Multiple personalities are fun! Everyone should have some!